Liberated parents… Chapter 5: Letting go: a dialogue on autonomy

“We help best by not helping.”
Here again, a notion already addressed in  How to talk so kids will listen..., in Chapter 4 about autonomy.

Our role as parents is to arm our children for their future life. We are here to help them build their autonomy. It is only in with this conviction that we can understand that it is not helping them to do for them. It is nice to do for them, but it’s not the best long term.
The best is for them to learn to handle things, and above all to learn that they can handle things.
Theoretically, I think everyone agrees with this, we only differ on the limits: how much at what age?
I believe that, without abandoning the children, we must try to aim for as much as possible as soon as possible.
Here in Puerto Rico, this certainly isn’t the most common philosophy… After all the French are not bad for that.
Yet, there is still room for improvement, following the guidelines already found in chapter 4 of How to talk so kids will listen
“Giving autonomy is a way to give love.” Dr Ginott
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